Arriving in the living room, Buffy quickly realized she'd made a mistake. Riley and Angel were standing toe to toe glaring at one another while Jonathan cowered in a corner. On closer inspection, Buffy saw that Jonathan was frightened, not just of the potential for a fight, but of the fact that Angel had gone into game face. Buffy moved to separate the two men.

"I can't leave you two alone together for a single minute, can I?"

"He started it," Angel began.

"I don't care who started it, it ends now! Sit! Both of you."

Angel and Riley took opposite ends of the sofa. When Buffy raised an eyebrow, Angel allowed his demon to retreat.

Jonathan left his corner and moved to Buffy's side.

"Um...Buffy, I know that these guys are both taller and better looking than me, but at least I don't get into fights."

Buffy turned to him and folded her arms across her chest. She unfolded them when she realized that Jonathan was now staring dumbfounded at her breasts.

"Jonathan? I'm up here."

The boy startled.

"Oh...yeah. Well, um, I know you think I'm not much of a man, but I could make you happier than anyone else could. If you go out with me, I'll even give you my entire collection of signed Star Wars game cards. So, would you?"

At this juncture, Dawn entered the room with Giles in tow.

"Hey Buffy, Giles made it after all!"

Giles looked a bit crestfallen when he saw who else was on the scene.

"I just wanted to drop by and wish Dawn a very happy birthday," he said.

"Um...not that I'm not glad to see you, but didn't you do that this morning?" Buffy asked.

"Yes, yes, I did. But as I recall, you did invite me to come back for cake."

Buffy grinned at him.

"I knew you couldn't hold out against that sweet tooth of yours. Tell you what, I've got a couple things to deal with here, and then it's cake time. Okay?"

"Okay." Giles turned to the youngest Summers. "In the meantime, Dawn, might I have a word with you in private?"

"Sure, Giles. I guess we could go to my room."

Buffy nodded her assent, and the pair walked upstairs. As soon as they were out of the room, Angel accosted her.

"Look, Buffy, you don't want to go out with that pipsqueak over there," he said as he pointed at Jonathan. "He's not good enough for you."

"And you are? As I recall, you already left me."

"Yeah, but I had to. But now, I think I can control things."

"How? How do you control a big, burning fated love?"

"Look, I'm as scared as you, Buffy, but I need to try. I can't really say it in normal words, so I'm going to do a little something I worked up to explain. It's a medley of show tunes..."

Before Buffy could protest, the vampire was singing in a weak, slightly off key voice:

"Memories...."

Riley rolled his eyes.

"That has got to be the lamest come on of all time. Look, Buffy, if these two are bothering you, I'll be happy to kick both their asses."

"How, Riley? How are you going to kick Angel's ass? And look at Jonathan; he's half your size and used to get beaten up by the AV club when we went to school. You'd just be a big bully."

"But we can fight demons together. I'm trained in this, Buffy. I can keep you safe."

Buffy shook her head.

"You couldn't take me when you were pumped full of Superman drugs. I thought you were a normal guy when we met. That's what I wanted...or at least I thought I did. Now you are, and I know that's not what I need. Besides, as soon as you were Joe Normal, you wigged. I don't want to get you killed, Riley, and that's what I'd do. I care about you way too much to do that. Just...go away and have a good life. I can't give you one. And for God's sake, Angel, will you stop singing? You have the crappiest voice I ever heard!"

Angel stopped dead in the middle of his solo rendition of the Colorado Love Call from Little Mary Sunshine.

"It...isn't that bad, is it?"

"You suck, Angel."

"Not humans..."

"I meant your singing. Look, even if we could be together, there's too much water under that bridge. I've moved on to the living and I like it. I'm sorry, but we're so over it's not even funny anymore. Go back to LA. Save some souls, and drop me a line once in a while. I'll always care, but I'm not your girl anymore. Let go."

Jonathan began to look hopeful. Buffy hated to crush him, but it had to be done.

"Don't even say anything, Jonathan. I'd get you killed in about a day and a half. Slaying isn't like playing Dungeons and Dragons. You can't just start again with a new character, and there's no treasure. It's all about killing or being killed, and you really don't want to mess with that. I'm sorry."

With that, she headed up the stairs, unsure why she was going there except in order to get away from all the lovesick swains in the living room.

Dawn's door was open a crack. Buffy knew the conversation in there wasn't meant for her ears, but she was near the door, so it wasn't as though she was really eavesdropping, was it? Nope. Just pausing outside her own bedroom door for a minute. She couldn't help it if she heard a little of what was said.

"Really? You do?" Dawn said.

"I know it's unlikely that she will return my feelings, but if she should do so, I wouldn't want to do anything to upset you," Giles assured her.

Buffy felt a stab of jealousy. Great. Giles had met a woman. Maybe that was what he meant about almost making a friend in England. Maybe he was bringing her here. Maybe he was planning to go back and be with her.

Either way, this was not what she wanted to hear.

"How would you feel about it, Dawn? And please, if you need time to think, then take it. As much as I want this, you do have a say in it."

"I don't have to think, Giles. I want you to stay. You may be kinda stuffy and old fashioned, but things get really weird when you're not around. Willow and Tara tried real hard, but it wasn't the same. I say go for it."

"She might say no, you realize."

"What would you do then?"

There was a long pause. Buffy nearly stopped breathing so she wouldn't miss the answer.

"In that case, I will stay. I'm not going anywhere unless Buffy sends me away."

"What if she wants to be with Riley or Angel again?"

"Then I shall take him aside and make it very clear to him that if Buffy is hurt in any way, he will have to answer to me...and quite possibly a baseball bat."

"You have a baseball bat?"

"I did at one time. If need be, I can get another."

"If you need one, I already have it."

"Well, that's one problem solved, then."

Buffy slipped back downstairs in a daze. She was the one Giles wanted to be with. A slow smile spread across her features as she headed back to the kitchen. Spike had joined the other suitors in the living room, but she ignored them all.

At the kitchen door, she turned back to where four men - well, two men and two vampires - argued vehemently over who was best suited to Buffy.

"I'm lighting the candles on the cake now, guys," she informed them. "Anyone who can behave themselves can stay and have cake. Anyone who gets out of line, is gone. Do you understand? Oh, and I'm not going out with any of you. Get that through your heads. I don't care whether any of you can sing or have piles of Sci-fi collectibles, or promise not to kill me anymore, I'm just not interested. In fact, I've already got a boyfriend."

She turned on her heel and headed out to the kitchen, refusing to answer the questions about this new man in her life.

Four dumbfounded men stared after her.

"Well," Spike sniffed at last. "That's torn it. I'm gonna go get myself a pack of fags." He patted his pockets and looked wide eyed at the others.

At last, Angel sighed and handed Spike a five dollar bill.

"Go on."

Spike grinned.

"Thanks, Dad."

With that, the blond vampire sauntered out the door. Angel looked at the clock.

"It's a long drive back to LA. I guess I should get started."

He, too, was gone.

Riley and Jonathan looked uncomfortably at one another.

"So," Jonathan said at last. "Do you like Star Wars? I got the Episode One DVD yesterday."

"Sure," Riley replied. "Y'know, I thought Jar Jar Binks was kinda cool."

"You too?"

As they left, they began to discuss the finer points of The Force.

*****

At last, the party was over, and most of the guests gone. Buffy put away the leftover food and dumped the dirty dishes in the sink. Giles suddenly appeared in the doorway with another plate.

"Thanks," she told him as he handed it to her.

"The party went well."

"I think Dawn liked your present best."

"I really should have asked you first, but I knew how very much Dawn wanted a dog."

"And how very much harder it would be for me to turn down the offer of a dog that was staring at me with big brown eyes?"

Giles smiled sheepishly.

"Were my tactics that obvious?"

"I just know you pretty well by now. You get sneaky once in a while."

"You noticed."

"There's another thing I noticed. You haven't said a single word about the testosterone convention here earlier. Why not?"

He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked thoughtful.

"I suppose I was waiting for you to tell me if there's anything I need to know about it."

"Yeah, I think there is, Giles," she said, turning to face him squarely. "I sent them all away. They're all nice guys in their own ways...even Spike sometimes...but they don't belong with me. Besides, there's someone I'm a lot more interested in now."

A flash of disappointment filled Giles' eyes and was gone as quickly as it arrived, replaced by a tired resignation.

"I see. Well, when do I meet this new young man of yours?"

"Who said he was young? And anyway, who said you hadn't met him?"

"Buffy, virtually the only man I know that you know who wasn't here tonight is Wesley. Y - you're not..."

"No, I'm not. And he was here tonight. Not Wes, the guy."

"I assume you don't mean Xander?"

"You assume correctly."

Giles wracked his brain, but remained utterly at a loss.

"Buffy, you're speaking in riddles. Would you mind giving me the answer?"

She smiled, but shook her head.

"You're the answer guy. You can figure it out. Now I'm going to do the dishes, and no, I don't want any help. Go find yourself a place to think and come see me when you work it out."

Without warning, she reached up and touched his cheek. Despite his surprise, he leaned instinctively into the caress

"Don't go too far. I know it won't take you all that long," she told him as she turned back to the sink.

Giles stood rooted to the spot for a long moment, then fled out the back door, his head swimming with hope, fear, and confusion.

*****

4

Notes and Disclaimer with part 1

Several minutes later, Giles had come to the inescapable conclusion that, other than Xander and the four lovestruck men Buffy had turned away, he was the only man who had been at the party. Still he sat on the back porch idly scratching Edgar's ears as he pondered the situation.

"Edgar, old boy, I have come to the painful realization that I will never understand women."

The beagle merely wagged his tail in reply, and nudged his chew toy closer to Giles.

The Englishman smiled and took the toy. He held it just out of the puppy's reach and squeaked it. Edgar barked and danced in anticipation of a good tussle. Giles squeaked the toy again and lifted it a bit higher.

Suddenly, he got a thoughtful look on his face. Wasn't this what he and Buffy had done with one another for years? They teased, they argued, they challenged, and they pushed each other's buttons. The one thing neither seemed able to do was to simply express affection in the standard, expected way.

He wondered which would have the courage to change the pattern just enough that they could act on their apparently mutual attraction.

*****

Willow, Tara, Xander and Anya slumped in their various seats around the living room, tired after the long day. The two witches had finally told their friends about the spell and its intended purpose.

"I don't know why you thought it would work," Anya said. "Buffy paid little attention to Riley when he was here. Besides, I never really liked him. He was not very demon compatible."

"But he loved her so much," Willow protested.

Xander shook his head.

"That's not always enough, Will."

"But...but he came back. All the way from Belize, he came back. It's...it's...inconceivable that she wouldn't take him back after that."

"Didn't Oz come back from Tibet?" Xander persisted. "Not to be rub it in guy, but I don't see him here tonight."

"Well...okay, yeah, but there were circumstances. I was already with Tara. Buffy's not with anybody. She hasn't been for a long time."

"You guys just don't get it, do you?"

The four turned to see Dawn on the stairs.

"Dawnie, what are you doing up at this hour?" Tara asked.

"I had to pee. I heard you guys talking."

"What is it we guys don't get?"

Anya sounded perplexed.

Dawn rolled her eyes.

"You don't get that Riley wasn't big, burning passion guy. He was total rebound guy. That's why Buffy let him go to Belize in the first place. She could have stopped him if she really wanted."

"Out of the mouths of babes..." Xander quipped.

"Anyway, I think there's someone else she's totally into now."

"I knew I felt her energy change," Tara said. "I knew she was ready. But if it's not Riley, then who is it?"

Dawn shook her head as if to pity the blindness of others.

"I'm not saying, but I think by morning, I won't have to." The girl yawned emphatically. "Good night, everybody."

"Hey!" Anya called after her, "Who is it? Darn! I hate it when people say they have a secret, but then they won't tell me what it is. It's very rude of them."

*****

Giles had become so engrossed in playing with Edgar that he didn't hear when the door opened. Buffy stood in the doorway trying hard not to laugh out loud at the sight before her.

Her Watcher was on his knees holding the squeaky hamburger as Edgar grabbed it in his teeth and did his best to pull it away from Giles. Edgar's tail wagged furiously even as he growled low in his throat. Giles responded with a growl of his own and a low laugh.

"Dat's a boy! Who's a good puppyboy?"

He let go of the toy and Edgar skidded backwards almost until he fell off the porch. The dog then let go of his toy and bounded at Giles. He licked the Watcher's face as Giles giggled merrily and made kissey noises at him.

Buffy couldn't repress her laughter anymore.

"You'd better not let Dawn catch you spoiling her dog."

Giles scrambled to his feet, his face bright red.

"Oh...ah...I'm afraid I don't know what got into me..."

"Giles. Chill. I won't rat you out."

She left the doorway and sat on the porch. Giles sat beside her so close they nearly touched and their postures mirrored one another. The wrapped their arms about their knees and looked at each other with sidelong glances.

"So, who should start?" Buffy asked.

"Ladies first."

"I think I already went first, back in the kitchen. Did you figure it out?"

Giles took a deep breath.

"Well, assuming that you refused all four of your suitors before turning them out, and assuming that Xander is not the object of your affections, that leaves only one possibility, doesn't it?"

"Making those two assumptions, yes."

"You have no intention of making this easy for me, have you?"

"Nope."

"Of course not. You never have. Why on earth should you start now?"

"Admit it, you love a challenge."

Giles smiled ruefully.

"How is it you read me so well?"

"I think it's like you and your books in Latin and Greek and stuff. If you take the time, you learn the language. Then everybody else gets impressed, when it was just about paying attention."

"There's a bit more to learning a language than that."

"Yeah, I know. But if more people took the time and tried, there'd be more multilingual people out there, too."

"Then why did you do so poorly in French?"

"Because I was only in it for the requirement. I had to graduate, and I needed a language to do it. If they'd had a class in Gilesean, maybe I would have done better."

Giles pulled off his glasses and put them in his pocket. He looked Buffy full in the face.

"If you speak...um...Gilesean...so well, what am I saying to you now?"

Buffy looked hard at him. After a moment she spoke.

"You want to believe in this, but you're scared. So am I y'know. You think maybe I'll be grossed out when I see you with no clothes on, or maybe I'm just latching onto something comfortable and I'll leave if Angel whistles again. That's not gonna happen. The others...they all did the dumbest stuff to try to impress me tonight, but you didn't. Note that I'm sitting here with you while the others are all gone."

"Buffy, I..."

"No, let me finish. You didn't do anything to impress me tonight, but you did it anyway. I heard you earlier, with Dawn. What you said...I was already having some pretty warm fuzzies for you, so this isn't just out of the blue, really, but I knew then that I could trust you not just with me, but with the thing in this world that means more to me than my own life: my little sister. I know I've hurt you a bunch of times, and I can't promise I'll never do it again. I'm not perfect, or anything. In fact, I can pretty much guarantee that I'll do something really crappy at some point. But I want to try not to do that. Giles, you know me like nobody else ever has, or ever will. I kinda get the feeling that it goes both ways, too. We've forgiven the unforgivable in each other over and over and over, and we're still together. Isn't that really what love is all about?"

"You know, I rather think it is. And I do, Buffy. I love you. I have done for a very long time now."

"I know. Like I said, I speak Gilesean. It's my second language. And I do, too. Love you."

Neither moved for a moment. They just sat, arms about their knees looking at one another happily. At last, Giles moved his arm to wrap it around Buffy's shoulders, and she allowed her head to rest against him. She let a contented sigh escape her lips.

"I think I like this being in love with you thing."

She felt his chuckle as it vibrated through her.

"It's nice, isn't it?"

"The nicest."

She looked up at him, and he looked down at her. Slowly, he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. She responded by moving her arms around his neck, holding him to her as she deepened the kiss. Neither noticed when the back door opened and four very surprised Scoobies appeared.

"Inconceivable!" Willow whimpered.

Xander wrapped an arm around his friends' shoulders.

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

With that, he firmly shepherded the others back into the house.

It was some time before Buffy and Giles ended their kiss and melted into one anothers arms in a warm embrace.

"Wow," Buffy breathed. "That was incredible."

"Again I must ask how in heaven's name did you do so poorly in French?"

The pair laughed as Buffy blushed.

"Maybe because I never did *that* to the teacher."

The were quiet for a time, simply enjoying an uncomplicated moment of joy. It was interrupted when Edgar shuffled over to them and nudged Giles to come play with him.

"Not just now, old boy," he told the puppy.

Edgar looked sadly at Giles, then at Buffy, then walked with his ears drooping nearly to the ground to a corner of the porch and curled up to sleep.

"I kinda get the feeling I'm not the only one around here who's totally in love with you," Buffy mused.

"Poor Edgar."

"Nah. I know you'll hang with him a lot. I'm not even jealous. See? This is me not being jealous."

Giles chuckled and kissed her softly.

"I suppose I really ought to go. Xander will be waiting."

"Or you could stay."

He tucked a stray curl behind her ear.

"As much as I'd like that, what about the example we'd be giving Dawn?"

"Actually, I was thinking that could wait. I want...I want to do this right. I want us to take our time a little bit. Y'know, be a little old fashioned with it."

"In deference to my being so old?" he asked, not without a tinge of bitterness.

"See, this is what I'm talking about, here. Will you please get it through your head that I don't care what you look like? Or, if I'm being honest, I do care, but not like that. I know you're a lot older than Riley and, while you're a lot younger than Angel or Spike, you look a lot older than them. I know you've spent most of your life fighting things that go bump in the night, and you don't have Slayer healing. I know even before I see all the details that your body isn't perfect anymore. But I know it'll be great. I know I'll love it. I know there's no way I won't be excited when we do make love. And I know you're the only man I'll want to be with for the rest of my life."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Giles - Rupert - this is true love. Do you think this happens every day?"

He swept her into his arms and held her close for a long time.

"I might have known," he told her at last.

"Known what?"

"That you would surprise me. It's virtually the only thing I can absolutely count on with you."

"So, I've got a sofa with your name on it. Want to stay? I even found the guest sheets and everything."

He looked down at her, his eyes filled with love.

"I'll count that as a yes."

She took his hand and led him into the house.

THE END